Women Drivers

Lady ! Who told you your Santro was a hovercraft ?

This is what we call timing !!

Ohh God ! They took a snap of mine while I was having one of those bad days with stomach and now its history.

Just look at this idiot ! Somebody please tell him its not funny .

Small Talk

Fucking looser get a life ! Just because you finally have a camera phone does not mean you devoid me of all privacy

Prodigious children

Poonam Mahajan will contest for Ghatkopar West.

Rahul Mahajan will contest for a Swyamvar.

Non Veg

Reently went to Lucknow, and knowing that it is a place of the Nawabs my eyes lit up at seeing the caption of this banner stuck on a road way store on one of those typical hungry afternoons.



Rest as we all call it - another blog post

Rules of the game

Finally after my 1001st warning and 2501 request I had to resort to adoption of visual aids to help my deaf room-mates understaning how to live a civilzied life

Today evening I landed with three A4 size print-outs conveying messages which had been taught to us in our kindergardens

This went at the main doors

This went at the chest of my poor freeze

ya ya my wardrobe!!

I will keep you all posted if I could make any head way and I mean literally way to the heads

Fitting into Pokiri

Finally after an exile of 10 days from theatres I caught the newly released Sallu special ' Wanted'. I had been restless throughout my two days stay at my sister's place waiting to come over to Gurgaon to catch the movie. Actually I must admit it, having stayed away from home for 8 years now; I can safely proclaim that I have turned out to be a total misfit in surrounding which have even an inkling of semblance to convivial family environments. Of course you have the advantages of relishing home cooked food, but isin't home cooked food an over rated term any way.

But more of that later, lets come back to 'Wanted'

I had seen the English name alike of 'Wanted' released in 2008. That movie had very little sense apart from bullet traversing curved paths, lot of gory blood shot scenes and plenty of mindless action. All you sane people would have started raising eyebrows now of the quality of the movie, but somehow I could not resist myself from loving the movie

It is infact one of those movies you would watch when your mid terms or end terms are going on – to pump up yourself to study before some boring examinations. Roomie and I had seen plenty of such movies at the wee hours before an important paper.

Sallu Bhai's wanted is one movie of similar genre. This movie is of course copied ( sorry remake ) from 'Pokiri' of Mahesh Babu fame. The super hit Telugu version had created such havoc among the minds of the auto drivers in Hyderabad that it's songs blared at full volumes in almost all autos. In the beginning, when I was new to Hyderabad, I would on such occasions request the auto drivers to lower the volume, to which I would get such furious glances from the ravanas that my meek self would shiver with fear. Of course the auto drivers would put 100% attempt on his part to make myself further uncomfortable by refusing to give change for auto fares even though he could have filled a piggy bank with his changes. But as much as I tried to resist infusion of the pokiri spirit in me, slowly and steadily the fire caught me. People would still remember the pokiri shirt phenomena which had caught aftermath the cult movie in AP. And I must admit it , even I was tempted to fit into one of those shirt several times. It is then that I was informed by some tabloid that the remake of that would be made in Hindi. I had waited with lofty expectation ever since, and too be honest Sallu bhai did not let me down. The movie is a out-and-out paisa vasool . the numerous whistles I heard in advanced multiplex bear testimony to that part ( obviously you have to spare that the audience was dominated by the young Jats of Haryana on whom Deol family thrived. ). Apart from chest heavy Ayesha Takia to let you down slightly ( this movie should have definitely been made with Illeana ) , the movie is a must watch for all those people who still rely and have faith on mindless action to spur them. Move away Rajiv Masands and Taran Adarshs fo the world , and let only the brawn spirit guide you- go and watch this movie this week. And I must also thank Salman for enacting the movie – for any sane actor would turn all wobbly making a choice for the movie.

It's a clear bet than Dil Bole Hadippa any ways

Unk- Unk

Hello,

Today I was trying to search another friend of mine of your name. You name came in the search result in the first page. The boy friend you made in the training period was a mutual friend so probably your name appeared as the top few of the search result. The curious I started exploring your scrap book. In those days scrap books were accessible to all and the lock feature did not come to foray. I felt warm at heart reading the scraps of your friends who had written to you regularly despite knowing that you did not use Orkut anymore. I am feeling bad that I am not able to recollect your face clearly today. You should have uploaded a snap of yours.
From day 1, I dint like your mannerisms, your way of wearing the scarf, your idiosyncratic ways. You perhaps did not like my boorish ways or my diffident ways of interacting with you.All throughout those two month of 2005 you and I tried best to ignore each other's presence in the training room.

I remember being stuck in lunch table with you. It was uncomfortable, the time span seemed eternal. I would stealthily raise my eyebrows to find out if you were looking at me or expected me to start a conversation. I am sure you were doing the same.

Finally those two months ended. I came for my stint at Hyderabad and you were left back at Mumbai. I am sure my name might have never flashed through your mind as soon as I left Mumbai. I too forgot about you until the day I heard about the fateful accident you had while driving to Shirdi with your family. We got your news later that you have entered Coma and were in vegetable state. Our mutual colleagues would discuss about you, naturally shocked a few days after the accident. Rumors started floating that your brother wanted the ventilator to be taken off you as he was unable to tolerate your lifeless state. But as it often happens the rumors too subsided in a few days and our selfish selves soon got busy in our little lives.

I remember it was March 2006; we came to know that you passed away. We made ourselves believe that it was perhaps the best thing which could happen to you after the accident.

You might be wondering how I came to remembering you today and write a whole blog post for you again?

Before you met that accident you had made an Orkut profile. Those were the days; the Orkut phenomenon was actually taking off in the country. Of course we both did not exist in each other's friend list. We remained the unk-unk to each other.

Regards,

Mithun

Bombay plans

I know a blog is not a twitter , but just had to update this



17/09/2009

'The bait has been laid again for XLers in Mumbai'

'Khud- ka - kataou Mission would start within 25 mins from now'

Hot Waitress Economic Index

Having come across this term in the ‘financial term of the day ‘of investopedia.com, my mind wandered to a parallel context in the current market scenario.
Investopedia defines ‘Hot waitress Economic Index ‘-Directly doing a ctrl-c ctrl-v from investopedia.com


An index that indicates the state of the economy by measuring the number of attractive people working as waiters/waitresses. According to the hot waitress index, the higher the number of good looking servers, the weaker the current state of the economy. It is assumed that attractive individuals do not tend to have trouble finding high-paying jobs during good economic times. During poor economic times, these jobs will be more difficult to find and therefore more attractive people will be forced to work in lower paying jobs such as being waiters/waitresses.

It would have been interesting to calculate the index for India, but considering that the percentage of opposite sex working as waitress in India would be miniscule, our index needs to be modified a little
We would define an index Hot female B School Economic index

‘An index that indicated the number of hot chicks passing out of B school who are employed in salaries which are less than the average salary of the batch passing out of their colleges.’

Mithunopedia explains Hot female B School Economic index as



Traditional recruitment theory in B schools says that failure of recruitment of very hot females or females in general could be an leading indicator of how bad the economy is. When the economy is good and the cash flows of the companies are more stable, male bosses venture out by hiring hot chicks under then to keep their peers, them as well as their clients or customers in humor. It is when the economy faces a downturn, the male bosses realize that their own jobs lie in the peril and the management would least not be happy if their subordinates recruit pretty good for nothing dolls


All you feminists do not haste, raise your eyebrows and call me a MCP; there is truth in the fact above.

Men are Dogs

‘Yaar !! you have like a bike, a WagonR,and your office is only 5 kms away , Why do you need to take the shared Vikram auto every day to office ‘
‘They are crowded’
‘That’s my point- Why do you still need to take those’
My friend non-chalantly replied, ‘Because those Vikrams are crowded by cute call centre girls – if you are lucky there is a probability that you might be surrounded by 5 chicks all around.’
‘And what about suffocation ‘, I smiled
‘Crazy !!!‘ – sniff sniff – ‘ That’s suffocation of the best kind’

Five point some one - How not to mistake an IITian

‘Meet him; he works with me in Oracle. He is an IITian, Delhi IIT’ (The whole world calls it Delhi IIT and I had always preferred IIT Delhi) , my friend introduced me to his girl-friend who surprisingly was not bad looking.
‘Wow, cool, IIT, you must be very intelligent’
I kept my tongue tied as my tradition has been throughout my life, in front of neat looking girls and babbled in-coherently, clearly looking flustered
‘Well yes, I mean I was not bad at school and after luck has to play a big part you know ‘– I safely had put the whole blame of my being an IITian on the lady luck ( My escape line which I had been using successfully used since 2001 after I passed that fateful examination.)
‘Hey, I would go and check out the counter and see why are they taking so much time- you both site behind and hog the table case it gets occupied. Sundays are so much more crowded here.’
That left me and my friend’s hot friend (the last words framed by me actually made me chuckle recollecting an episodes of ‘Naughty America’ – I really am a dog. ) with nothing in common to talk. I tried to avert her furtive glances and fixated my views mechanically on the toddler on the table right of me – who was banging the empty coke can on the table, whereas his parents totally oblivious to this were completely involved among themselves. I for once slyly glanced at her, to which she smiled and as I as though hit by shock quickly looked the other side averting her look.
‘ So an Delhi IIT product ( she considered IIT as a manufacturing factory) , which hostel ‘
Oh no I know where it is leading – not again ‘Nilgiri, I replied – IIT Delhi hostels are named after mountains ‘
‘ Oh yes , like Kumaon’ – The idiot Chetan Bhagat had perhaps managed to brand Kumaon so high in the minds of non IIT Delhi pass oust that , fresh entrants would now have probably started giving preference of Kumaon hostel first before the branches. ‘ So you must have read 5 point some-one – of course you must have its your story ‘
And here came the dreaded question – ‘ No I have not ‘, I replied in I do not know why guilty tone.
‘You must ‘– She ordered as if she was shell shocked – you would be able to relate so much more’. I at that moment wanted to strangle Bhagat and hang at the same gallows in which his illustrious name alike was executed before independence.
‘ Ya I will – I mean all say that it’s an IITian story , and I mean I am from the same college , so really did not find it important .Besides most of the facts mentioned in the novels are such blatant lies that masking them as fiction would be preposterous. ‘
‘Umm- I don’t know why S has yet not returned back’ she snapped (She clearly seemed offended by my branding her only read literature with such coarse words)
Obviously that was my last conversation with her the whole evening and all plans of reenactment of the movie ‘unfaithful’ went for a toss.

P.S: After countless encounters like the incident above due to that miscreant Bhagat, I finally faced his master – piece today and completed it in 3.5 hrs. Exactly how long it takes to complete a long over drawn Bollywood movie. For most past I breezed past it and actually enjoying it like a typical Hindi movie goers does. One submission though, with the CGPA word making an appearance in every page of the novel –people might think that it is the most used term by an IITian. It’s not – apart from the first and last semester the term remains oblivious for most of the time in the four years

Flying

A tick against one of the item of my wish list
‘To fly or at least give a semblance of flying’

Life just like that - IV

If you are really free with nothing to do, if you are alone at your home, if you do not have electricity at home, if it's raining and you too feel nostalgic at home like I do, if you have a data card with you, if you still remember the password of your first email account, then do check that account and recollect those old emails. I am sure it would make you feel warm at heart after a very long time. I just had one of those magical experiences today

    A few years ago there used to be a portal called rediff.com and every mortal Indian used to have an account with it. But slowly with the advent of the gmails , orkut and facebooks of the e-world rediff somehow effaced out of context. Interestingly if one compared the UI of the yesteryear's Rediff and the current one one could markedly see that the login box which was so prominent is replaced by a sign in button on the extreme right corner. Probably they too realized that they could not compete with the googles of the world and emails went out of context.

So today out of nowhere I suddenly realized that I had a rediff account too , I enthusiastically explored my old account. And hoping across the emails I found mails written by me to my father and his reply to those emails. I have just copy pasted the emails in this forum. While reading them just remember that I was 18 , had an absolutely shit writing speed and I wrote those emails in the comp of the person who brought the first computer in our batch and there was always 10 people on queue to jump over to his computer.

 

hello baba,

 i am very well over here . i did not need so much of money but any way i will any way need it in the next semester for paying the mess dues . any way baba i have made my reservations done . the price of tickets have increased , it has gone to rs 421 from rs 383 . i have my reservations for 4 th of may . i will reach there by the 5 th . yesterday i had chatted with dada , felt good , and i longed to return back to jsr , but any way i will be reaching back only after 1 month . my mid sem brk ends today . from tomorrow i will be having my regular classes  starting . most of the students are returning after their hloidays , subba has also returned back . i do not think that i have any thing more to say ........

bye........

i spend holi well

bubai

If you smugly smiled at the last email read the mail below .

hello  baba,
i have submitted the form for booking the guest house for 2 rd and 24 th..   i could do fopr more days as we can book for 2 days only..   any way the room costs rs 260…..   and i made single room 2 b le b ed  any way they were saying that we   may not get also… as sopme professors are abt to visit iit…..   any way tell me when are u returning so that i ur way back also…. i can book the guest house…   topmorrow is saptami   and guess what i dint know it also…   actually saptami here has no special significance..   any bye….  i dont think that i have more to say
  bubai

I really do not understand why I committed so many spelling mistakes in this email or this was the only way I knew to write emails.

Baba had a classic reply to this email

Hello beta
Here's wishing you and  your friends a very Happy and Blissful Vijayadashami. May Goddess Durga bless  you with Peace & Prosperity in life and fulfil all your  wishes.I received your e-mail but i could not understand what you have written, you should check spelling etc., before mailing.book the guest house for 23rd oct and 29 oct positively.
rest is ok
Baba

Reading those email I longed to be 18 again and spend my first year at IIT back again. If you look back now, those illogical emails sound so much more logical now. And life would not have been bad if we had not turned so web savvy or perhaps life had just remained like that !!

Tongue twisters

One of my friend Bharat updated his status in Facebook “ is tired of reading his name Bharath “. Of course you will only get no prize for guessing it correct that the unfortunate soul is spending his first few salaries in a ‘metro’ called Chennai. Now if try to do an analogy on myself, my name has been miss-spelt by one and all from all parts of the country

Hyderabadis would spell me

Midun Pande , Midhun Pandae , Mitun Panday

Mumbaikars would spell me

Mithun Pande definitely and this included my ex GF for a long period of time until I asked her to either dump me, ask to get dumped or spell me properly. But they of course have their excuses of being lived their whole lives with the Deshpandes of the worlds.

Bongs would pronounce me

मिठुन and I would remind them each time that it is मिथुन . Unfortunately they would all agree with me, nod their heads , swear to pronounce it right next time and pronounce मिठुन next time around

Punjabis from Punjab would definitely pronounce me पान –दे.

Observing all these and with my name being no tongue twister I wonder how they would spell/ pronounce Czechoslovakia.